DIEFAILING

by where is my spaceship

/
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1.
/ / 00:50
everythings a waste its all pointless that was a big deal for a while there i was nothing i was no one now i can't see any distinction take it easy
2.
everythings a waste. its all pointless. yeah it’s a big deal but we’re already over it. empty is kid shit. lonely is passe. 30's the new 17. and you’re ok. yeah you're ok. you were seven. you were sixteen. you were twenty one, so i guess you were eighteen. you were thirty six. you were fourty five. its been a long time, but you were fourty five. you let things stumble by, you let them get away so now you blame yourself for all the moves you didn’t make we've all wanted to turn around go back to being kids like just because we're old we aren't fucking idiots like just because we're old we aren't fucking idiots i know you'd like to think you could've got that job you could have kept that girl you could have won that fight you could have buckled down you could have could have been strong you could have done things right you could have even tried then you’d have a different life you could have i guess you could have but you are fine you are alright you just can't do it
3.
i was livin the dream now im kicked off the team and everybodys lookin at me sideways coach says i gotta move on and that i'm not even in high school and that this is a high school he says that i should go to college but i dont wanna go to college i don't wanna take a loan out i think i'll just live in the basement i don't wanna get a day job i don't wanna get married i don't wanna have a baby i don't wanna get a hobby my girlfriend left she says that i'm a loser and now i catch her lookin at me sideways she told me i should get a real job said i got a real job she said that i should try going to college but i dont wanna go to college i don't wanna get a day job i think i'll just live in the basement i don't wanna get married i don't wanna take a loan out i don't wanna have a baby i don't wanna get a hobby i just wanna play football i don't wanna go to college i don't wanna get a day job i don't wanna get married i'm never ever gettin married im just gonna play football i don't care about the nfl everyone here already knows me and i like playin for the home team they used to give me free burgers down at the diner on main street said it would help me keep my weight up nobody tries to keep my weight up anymore i don't wanna go to college
4.
25 02:15
you've got a drawn face like you've seen some hard times but come on what's the problem? kid you're only 25 you're only 25 you're only 25 i guess its an issue that you're feeling aimless i know it's a problem but where you gonna go you're only 25 you're only 25 you're only 25 i know that its hard working with what you've got theres someone you woke up and found out you're not i know where you are and it's not giving up what you had wasn't it you just thought that it was and living is tough and you're fucking it up and you're sad and you're lost and you're mean when you're drunk i know what it is i know what you want there's something you knew but woke up and forgot and everythings gone all the good days are done something was fucking great but what was it come on you know what it is you know what you want there's something you were till you found out you're not you're only 25 you're only 25 you're only 25
5.
crash my car 04:52
sometimes i wanna crash my car cut the wheel real hard i dont really know why its not like i wanna die mostly i feel pretty good sometimes im making a familiar turn when im on my way to work and the idea creeps into my mind but i just drive
6.
I wish I had a friend and I could stay at their house and I could eat all their food and i could sleep on their couch i wish that i had a friend that had an extra bedroom and i could take a little break and figure out exactly what im gonna do i wish i had a friend that had a big screen tv then i could sell my tv id probably get four hundred dollars for it livin on your couch, that could last three or four weeks and ill just watch your television every night until i pass out until i pass out cuz i pass out what am i gonna do
7.
when you're a little kid and somebody asks you what you wanna be when you grow up and you tell em that you wanna be the president or maybe that you want to be an astronaut or a teacher or a fire truck or a doctor or a dog no one ever tells you that it sucks to be anything at all it sucks being a slacker and it sucks bein a drone and it sucks being addicted but it sucks not being stoned it sucks to be a boyfriend and it sucks being alone everyones depending on me my friends and my fucking bosses never thought i'd say this but i think i might go back to college honestly so I think I'll go back to college forever i won't take any classes i won't write any papers i'll just live in the basement like I did 10 years ago consider this my application i know admissions has been waiting im exactly the kind of student youre looking for ill take out loan after loan after loan after loan they wont be my problem
8.
you talk like adam when you're angry cuz you watch a lot of tv harsh and clipped and with an accent makes it sound like you're from boston you're from boston you smile out your parents' basement window so i know you're glad to see me later on i catch you making that same face in the mirror and i ask you what you're doing and you tell me that it's nothing and you tell me that you love me and the syllables come out like you are really really trying
9.
really lost 03:13
these expeditions are getting reckless we're getting further out and more disconnected everybodys been taught a lot of ways to feel small sometimes forgetting that can make us strong i just get scared sometimes, when im lost, i might really be lost and there are some things that you can never fix at all
10.
28 02:16
you've got a drawn face like you've seen some hard times but come on what's the problem you're only 25 i guess its an issue that you're feeling aimless i know it's a problem but where you gonna go you're only 25
11.
you can have those drugs you can have those drugs you can snort those drugs you can do those drugs you can have those drugs you can try your best you can try your best you won't be like the rest and we'll all be impressed because you tried your best you can fall in love you can fall in love you can fall in love you can marry up you can fall in love and you can fuck that up yeah you can fuck that you you can fuck it up who gives a fuck yeah you can fuck it up you can fuck it up who gives a fuck who gives a fuck you can try again you can try again or don't try again i'll still be your friend if you don't try again

credits

released September 15, 2017

written and performed by josh evensen.
drums by matt olsson.

recorded partially by josh evensen,
and then by kevin mcmahon at marcata studios.
mixed and mastered by kevin mcmahon at marcata studios.

art by ashley tobin.

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where is my spaceship Hackensack, New Jersey

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